All Psyched up: Vulnerability

By Dr. Linda Hancock on March 8, 2025.

I always try to do the things that I recommend to my clients.

This past month I have had two opportunities to do this.

In January, I had cataract surgery – first the left eye and then 10 days later, the right eye.

Even though recommendations were to not work for two weeks after each, I was stubborn and continued with my scheduled appointments.

The biggest problem was that before the surgery I could see up close quite well without glasses but not at a distance. The new lenses reversed the process and now I see at a distance quite well but not up close.

Fortunately, I could talk and type without looking at the keys. (Just not too sure exactly what I typed but will find out in a few weeks when I get glasses). Unfortunately, I found that I began having a few headaches and was very tired. Everything seemed to take more effort and energy than in the past!

I was minimizing this until one day, when I had treatment with my energy therapist I began to cry.

She was surprised as usually I am very positive, but I said that I felt as weak as I had after each of my previous seven surgeries. She reminded me that I had just had two more surgeries.

Somehow I had associated surgery with cuts and stitches in my body and hadn’t respected the eye surgery as a similar trauma!

The good news is that I now have more compassion for those who are struggling with similar situations and have been reminded about the importance of self-care practice.

The next experience involved taking a personal risk in the community where I live.

I was so disappointed when five of my best friends shared their plans to move away.

My grandson had been encouraging me for some time to make new friends, but this hadn’t been a priority. Because I work, I didn’t get too involved, and most people just knew me as “the doctor” or “Dr Linda”.

Now I needed a plan!

One day, in the elevator, I noticed a sign advertising a Masquerade Ball. My first thought was whether Cinderella would show up!

Because I didn’t have any pink or blue ball gowns, I decided to dress as Her Royal Highness, the Princess Incognito. An inexpensive wig and king’s crown completed the “royal” outfit that I scrounged from my closet and jewelry case.

I made a calling card with the cutout of a glass slipper and carriage on the front.

Inside was a photo of the back of a prince dressed in cape and crown along with the words “Has anybody seen my Prince Charming…”.

One of the ladies at reception lent me her small rubber frog. A friend purchased a ticket for me so that my name would not appear on the guest list (remember that Cinderella didn’t give advance notice that she would attend the ball).

When I made my entrance approximately 20 minutes after the start of the dance, I walked through the tables waving. Surprisingly, out of the more than 50 guests, only three knew me but several people waved and smiled.

I went to each table showing my calling card, placing the king’s crown on the heads of each male, while asking if he might be my Prince. Several took photos but not one male matched the photo!

A young cowboy asked me to dance and even though it had been three or more decades since I had jived, we performed to the thrill of the crowd.

I made my second round with the plastic frog stating that I was now desperate and might have to kiss the frog to find my prince.

The whole evening was very fun! I had my mask on the whole time and didn’t really get to know people very well but after a couple of hours, everyone knew who I was!

I won first prize and even though the goal was to introduce myself to the community as an approachable “Linda” instead of “Dr. Linda” I was surprised to learn that every condo unit received an email with photos announcing the winners and the screens in all the buildings also did the same.

The serendipity was that because I do not have glasses yet, I could easily wear a mask whereas otherwise I might have wondered how to do that!

Being vulnerable means dealing with weaknesses in a healthy manner and learning how to take risks in order to improve your life.

What have you done lately to increase your compassion and expand your social groups? Go ahead. Take a chance! You definitely won’t have regrets.

I know because I did it so can be an example for you to follow!

Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Calgary. She can be reached by email at office@drlindahancock.com

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