All Psyched Up: Try?
By Linda Hancock on August 3, 2024.
In the popular Star Wars Series there is an episode called “The Empire Strikes Back.” In this movie, the star Luke Skywalker finds his X-Wing stuck in a swamp and is frustrated trying to levitate it out. The wise character Yoga confronts Luke and states the now-famous quote from which we all can learn. He says, “Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.” Why do people say they will try? Perhaps it’s because they are: 1. Lacking commitment – Often we do not want to get involved in something unless it is our idea. When others suggest that we should become involved in an activity and we don’t want to do this, it might seem to be more polite to say “I’ll try” without giving a guarantee. 2. Fearing failure — Lack of confidence in our ability to succeed can lead us to a point of stating that we will try instead of saying that we will do it. Then, if we don’t finish the project we won’t look and feel like a failure. 3. Having an “out” – If you promise to try and don’t accomplish the task, you might think that you will not be held responsible. You can pass it off by saying that you did what you promised – you tried. 4. Caught up in busyness – A full schedule might not offer time to do something but saying “I’ll try” seems to offer a little hope that things will happen even though it is not a priority. 5. Defaulting to passivity – Those who do not have strong boundaries might be uncomfortable saying “No” to someone. “I’ll try” is a less firm response. When do people NOT say “I’ll try”: 1. Desperation – When you are at a point that you must do something in order to survive, you will go far beyond a weak commitment. 2. Passion – Those who are extremely interested in a project and determined to achieve success, will invest more time, effort and emotion into the tasks involved. 3. Fear – This can be used to stop or to fuel energy into completion of a challenge. 4. Vision – Think of famous scientists who were determined to understand mysteries and find new ways of doing things. Elon Musk is a great example of someone who toys with ideas that most of us have not considered. 5. Calling – Many people have sacrificed and done things because they believed that they were called to do so. The foundation for this might be spiritual or involve reliance of others who need that person to save or lead them. The next time that you hear some say “I’ll try,” see if you can figure out the reason why they said that. Better yet, get to know yourself better by examining your motivation when you find yourself responding to a request with the words “I’ll try.” Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Calgary. She can be reached by email at office@drlindahancock.com 16-15
