May 17th, 2024

All Psyched Up: Patience and timing

By DR. LINDA HANCOCK on June 4, 2022.

As a child I remember people talking about how you had to have the crop in the ground by May 10, but bedding plants weren’t put out until the Victoria Day long weekend.

I am trying to keep these things in mind as I yearn for spring. It seems to be very slow in coming this year. Was the winter longer than usual or am I just eager to sit on my new patio? I was used to Medicine Hat’s high temperatures and have already noticed that Calgary is cooler. Am I impatient?

This week, the plan was to scrub the deck floor. I was shocked to open the blinds and see snow! Not just snow on the ground but a constant shower of it still falling down. So much for that plan.

I purchased a new barbecue and was eager to prepare my first meal on it. Well, the valve to convert propane to gas didn’t fit. Fortunately, my son-in-law volunteered to shop for the one I need. Not sure when that will occur.

Sometimes we plan things and then feel out of control because of factors we didn’t expect. We do our best to prepare for things only to find that they aren’t going to happen or won’t happen in the timeframe that we thought was achievable.

I remember years ago when someone told me, “We are never disappointed unless we have expectations.” Wisdom!

And what do we do when things don’t work out the way we expected? Here are your choices:

• Fret and lose sleep. Well that isn’t going to solve the problem or help you to feel better about it, is it? When you find yourself saying “What if…?” too often you know your anxiety is taking over your thoughts.

• Make a new plan. Perhaps you can change the date or do things differently. In fact, the second choice might turn out to be better than the first one if we give it a chance.

• Know waiting can be a serendipitous gift that you didn’t expect. Perhaps you will become more patient or understanding. This is just good practice for future events.

• Use the waiting time to enjoy something you would otherwise not have done. Maybe you can focus on a different project. Perhaps you need rest or can take advantage of this opportunity to bring out a neglected hobby. Phone a friend, read a book, volunteer.

• Enjoy the day no matter what happens. Happiness is a choice and contentment results when you have a positive attitude.

I always chuckle when I think about the White Rabbit from Alice in Wonderful. He is racing around, looking at his watch and repeating “I’m late. I’m late, for a very important date. No time to say hello, goodbye. I’m late. I’m late. I’m late.” Poor thing doesn’t allow himself to enjoy the moment because he has so much angst about time and expectations.

I don’t want to live like that White Rabbit. Do you?

Time to learn to live one day at a time and enjoy every blessing that comes with it.

Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice. Visit http://www.LindaHancock.com or email her at office@drlindahancock.com.

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