All Psyched Up: Wants or needs?

By Linda Hancock on December 14, 2024.

On November 11, 2023, my only nephew, Kyle, died suddenly at the age of 39 years. He had been healthy and strong, so we were shocked. It was sad when, a few weeks later, his two sons, aged 6 and 8 years, went to see Santa Claus. When asked what they wanted for Christmas they said, “We want our dad back”. They wanted him and they needed him.

Over the past year, their grandfathers and men in the community have endeavoured to support and be role-models for the boys but they miss their dad.

It is difficult at times to distinguish our needs from our wants.

When my son visited California, he purchased a souvenir plague that read: “Regulation #5: You are entitled to food, clothing, shelter and medical attention. Anything else that you get is a privilege. USP Alcatraz. Institution Rules and Regulations.”

Living in a society that is so abundant can be confusing. Each of us can probably look around our home and find books that haven’t been read, clothing with tags still attached and even food that is ready to be thrown out.

Unfortunately, the world is full of situations where basic needs aren’t met, and starvation is prevalent. You don’t have to live in a war zone to know that life can be dangerous and difficult. Perhaps your neighbour is struggling and can’t seem to make ends meet or feel joy. They might not feel that there is any hope for them.

I know that what I need besides air and food is freedom, connection with positive people and the opportunity to use my skills and abilities. Notice that none of these things cost money but each has great value.

What do you need? Are you surrounded with your wants or thoughts of more things that you want?

Do you have things in your life that you could share with others who would be blessed to receive them? Perhaps even taking a little time to visit with someone who is lonely would be a wonderful gift.

You see, it doesn’t take a lot of money to fill the needs and wants of other people. You already have everything you need and a lot of what you want.

In fact, most of us have lives full of blessings that are pressed down, shaken together and overflowing.

Any ideas about what to do next?

I hope that this article has got you thinking!

Dr. Linda Hancock, the author of “Life is An Adventure…every step of the way” and “Open for Business Success” is a Registered Psychologist who has a private practice in Calgary. She can be reached by email at office@drlindahancock.com

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