I have for you a true crime story, one that happened in this very city.
The following information has been withheld for years, but I feel it’s time the public hear this compelling tale. This month marks the 10th year I’ve been with 102.1 CJCY. I’ve had a few different roles over the last decade and in those early years, much of my time was spent reporting from Medicine Hat Provincial Court.
I’ve seen and heard plenty of weird things inside those walls, like the suspected drug dealer who blew kisses to the gallery from the prisoners’ box, or the convicted stalker whose text messages included, “I want to cut off your hand so I can hold it forever.” However, this particular story haunts me to this day.
It happened early in my CJCY career during a coffee chain promotion, which for legal purposes we’ll call “Look Under The Brim.” I recall a fellow reporter from the Medicine Hat News sipping on a Double Double before the start of court proceedings. Now, you’re not allowed to take drinks into the actual courtroom, so there’s a designated table to put cups on until you return. That’s exactly what our protagonist did before his fateful walk into Courtroom No. 9.
During a short recess 45 minutes later, we emerged to find the mangled remains of the reporter’s coffee cup. Its lifeless body oozing equal parts of cream and sugar, while the head was completely ripped off. Someone decapitated this cup. Why? For the sole purpose of claiming whatever treasure should be revealed when they “Look Under The Brim.” To our surprise, the suspect actually left a detailed confession at the crime scene. On the back of a tattered, empty cigarette package were the words, “Sorry bro, didn’t have change. Need coffee.”
It was quite apparent we were staring at one of the most Canadian crimes imaginable, destroying someone’s Double Double, stealing their “Look Under The Brim” piece and then apologizing for it. Might I add, this brazen thief pulled off the heist in broad daylight, in a court of law, only metres away from an Alberta Sheriff.
If you’re reading this Coffee Cup Killer, I commend your determination to get that free drink, but I know someday justice will be served. And when that day comes, it shall be served like a Double Double, piping hot and a 63 per cent chance it will end up burning your crotch.
Steve Krysak is half of CJCY Mornings with John & Steve, on your radio 6-10 a.m. weekdays and 7-10 a.m. Saturdays at 102.1 FM and cjcyfm.com
