Just Pondering: The love game for long haulers

By Medicine Hat News Opinion on February 25, 2021.

ell here it is, the end of February and Valentine’s Day has come and gone.

For some of you, Cupid’s arrow has struck and wedding bells are in the future. Congratulations. I personally have been married for 33 years, and I might add to the same guy! It has been a journey like no other and no one can really explain it but I thought maybe I would wade in with my ponderings on wedded bliss. After all I am old and you will forgive me! So take it or leave it, but I’m thinking a few of these tips may be helpful or at least give a chuckle to us long haulers in the love game.

I remember back in the 70’s there was movie called “Love Story” and a famous line from that movie was, “Love means never having to say your sorry.” Absolute rubbish! Written by a divorce lawyer. My hubby always says he is sorry and wrong in the same breath , very often, and I am very happy. Happy wife, happy life as the saying goes!

Never under any circumstances do home renovations together unless you are one of those couples who has your own DIY shows on TV. Are these people truly real? I love watching them, but really hate them all at the same time. In our house we learned very early that even hanging wallpaper could turn into battle royale and we now have a professional on speed dial. Just trust me on this.

I like to think of marriage as a dance. When we start out together we picture ourselves as Fred and Ginger floating across the floor looking so elegant, never missing a step. Then someone throws a banana peel under your feet. Whoops ! We now look like two bob cats trying to fight their way out of a sack. Its life but pretty soon you hit your stride again and you figure it out.

Every self help book on marriage will mention that communication is the key to a good relationship. However you have to hear the communication first.

Famous story in our house is the year we hosted Christmas with 25 kin folk (remember those days?!) Wonderful time, but it went a bit sideways when my husband lifted the beautiful bird out of the oven and turned to me saying, “I think it is a success.” What I heard was, “Do you want to go have sex?” Oh boy. Needless to say I now wear hearing aids. Much better in our house now.

I wish everyone a happy belated Valentine’s Day and hope this helps with the February doldrums. Oh and please hug that significant other and tell them they are special – just because they really are! Stay safe and well.

Allyson McCaw is a Medicine Hatter. Her column, Just Pondering, will run on the fourth Thursday of each month. Feedback can be sent to letters@medicinehatnews.com

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